Thursday, September 8, 2011

First Campaigner Challenge--200 word flash fiction

Rachel Harrie has posted the first campaigner challenge. Write a short story/flash fiction story in 200 words or less, excluding the title. It can be in any format, including a poem. Begin the story with the words, “The door swung open” These four words will be included in the word count.

If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional), use the same beginning words and end with the words: "the door swung shut." (also included in the word count)


For those who want an even greater challenge, make your story 200 words EXACTLY!




                                                      MAC’S UNCANNY ABILITY
                                                                       By
                                                         Catherine A. Winn


The door swung open, Officer Dave glanced out.
“Who is it?” Hilda Gross wrung her hands.
 “You sent for me?” Detective Mac Worth asked.
“Looks like the Ski-Mask Bandit has changed and messed the place up.”
“Anyone hurt?”
“No.”
Mac said. “Give me a minute.”
Mac scanned the boutique. Everything was in disarray. The register had been cleaned out and dumped on the floor.
“You okay, Ma’am?”
“Yes, thank you, Detective.”
Officer Dave read from his notes. “After closing, Ms. Gross sat at her desk doing some inventory updates.”
Hilda interrupted. “And then out of nowhere this horrible, horrible little man with a ski mask came in and tied me up. He got away through the back door.”
“I see,” Mac said.
 “Stupid me, I forgot to lock the front door.” She pointed to the open safe. “He cleaned me out; now I’ll probably get fired!”
 “We’re going to have to catch this guy, Mac.”
 “You already did,” Mac said. “Our robber is right here.”
Hilda Gross protested her innocence. Officer Dave’s search produced a bag full of cash.
“Mac, how in the world did you figure this out?”

(see comment section for the answer)


24 comments:

  1. Answer: This was personal. The bandit "has changed and messed the place up"

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  2. Nice story -- I started wondering because Hilda was talking so much.

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  3. Patricia, thank you. I tried to run over to your blog, but could only see the profile page and couldn't view the blog.

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  4. I was about to say. She seemed rather collected for having been robbed.

    That was a good read, Catherine! :)

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  5. A nice little mystery. ;) Great job!

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  6. Good one! I really enjoyed this :)

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  7. Fun. I'm trying it too! It will be posted shortly.

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  8. Great to read a mystery. Very well done with the dialogue. Denise

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  9. What a fun story! I definitely didn't guess the answer, though I did suspect something was up with the "changed" part at the beginning. Great piece!

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  10. This was great! Reminded me of reading Encyclopedia Brown!

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  11. Thanks, everyone, for the wonderful comments! I've been having a wonderful time reading all your entries. Wow is there a whole lot of talented campaigners!

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  12. Good dialogue. Enjoyed this tale Diane. Nice turn of events in the ending.

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  13. So much fun. Didn't see it coming. Well done!

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  14. Great piece. I love that you did a mystery!

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  15. This is the first mystery flash fiction I've come across. Great ending. :)

    My entry.

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  16. hehe very cool! I love Nancy Drew and The Hardy Boys!! They were some of the first books I read by myself - my siblings' ragged hand-me-down copies, flinched from their bookshelves, lol.

    I'm in your YA group, btw! Nice to meet you!

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  17. I'm so glad you all stopped by and made such nice comments. This challenge was fun. Am still reading and enjoying all those posted, hope I get to most of them.

    Tessa, glad you're in my group! Nice to meet you!

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  18. What a fun little mystery! I haven't seen this yet in the Campaign.

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